I don’t know if you’re like me, but it’s so easy to romanticize the creative process when it comes to composition. I’ll hear a gorgeous piece of music and imagine the composer as this incredible, deep-thinking, zen-like person. Maybe they’re sitting in silence with candles flickering, ocean waves crashing in the background, a grand piano positioned by floor-to-ceiling windows overlooking dramatic cliffs. It’s tempting to picture the creation of beautiful music as something magical and pristine. But, as any composer will tell you, the reality is far less glamorous.
The process of creating music is rarely romantic. Behind most great pieces is a journey filled with challenges, self-doubt, and the constant temptation to give up when things don’t sound the way you hoped. It demands persistence—working through frustration and uncertainty to bring an idea to life.
This past summer, before a trip to Europe where I was scheduled to create new music and collaborate with other composers, I spent countless hours in my small, hot garage studio. I wrestled with ideas, second-guessed myself consistently, and hated the sound of nearly everything I tried. There were so many moments where I was certain this would end in failure, that I’d make a fool of myself. Sparks of inspiration felt buried under the weight of how unfinished and raw everything sounded.
There’s a vulnerability to creating something new and sharing it with the world. It’s not just about the work itself—it’s about facing the fear of rejection. Many of us carry memories of failure or criticism, even from childhood, and those moments can make us hesitant to take risks—especially when the stakes feel very personal. It can feel presumptuous to believe the world wants to hear my music. But playing it safe often means never creating anything truly authentic, which is at the heart of good art.
Over the past few years, I’ve had the chance to work on a few different larger projects and one that stands out was a 10-song album for a music supervisor. I remember bringing in 25 to 30 ideas after hours of work, only to walk away with 2 or 3 that might be usable. It felt quite discouraging at times, even frustrating. And so I went back to work, came up with another handful of ideas and again, walked away with just a few that worked. But in the end, we found the 10 pieces that made the project work, and now I’m very proud of it. But that doesn’t mean it was easy. It took countless hours of trial and error—rejecting most of the ideas but uncovering a few gems. Pushing forward, even when it felt like giving up was the smarter option, was what ultimately made it worthwhile.
It’s always sad to hear about people who stop creating because of rejection. Critique is, of course essential to making good art, but it has to come from the right place—ideally, a trusted relationship or an invitation to give feedback. Careless criticism can shut down creativity before it even has the chance to grow, and that’s a loss for everyone.
The truth is, creating music isn’t usually a neat or romantic experience. It’s often messy and full of doubt. There are times when nothing seems to work, and you’re tempted to quit. But then, there are those moments when something clicks—when an idea comes together and feels like it might actually be worthwhile. Those moments make the struggle worth it.
Occasionally, someone will tell me that a piece I’ve written meant something to them, helped them through a tough time, or inspired them. When that happens, I think back to how close I came to scrapping that very piece. It’s humbling to realize that something I almost gave up on could end up meaning so much to someone else. That’s a pretty beautiful thing.
So, the next time you hear a piece of music and feel moved by its beauty, remember: it likely came from a place of doubt, struggle, and persistence. The final product might sound effortless, but the journey to get there was anything but. It’s a reminder that great things often emerge from messy, uncertain beginnings. And in many ways, that journey is an important part of the gift.